A Series of Crushes (Parentheses make it match)

With the advent of my fiercely popular blog, I have recently rediscovered my previous contribution to the internet, the Xanga of my youth.

Because I am the person that I am, I felt compelled to read the workings of my early high school mind. Some of it is embarrassing, some of it is actually kind of funny, but most of it is sad. The journal reeks of failed relationships.

That said, it also allows me to see very seminal moments in my life that seemed fairly mundane when I was 14 years old, but ended up having a major impact on the rest of my life up to this point.

So, due to the fact that this transitional period in my life (high school/college) has caused basically nothing but self reflection, I've decided to document the 3 major high school crushes in my life, with perhaps a sprinkling of some lesser ones thrown in, like a sorbet to cleanse the pallet of my overwhelming failure.

You may ask, Why? Why do you feel the obsessive need to relive these painful memories that everyone shares some semblance of and doesn't care to read about. The answer is because I am an emotional masochist. I must constantly relive my grief in my head and share it with others. That seems like a very unproductive and probably unhealthy way to spend your time, but I'm getting better about letting it go, so hopefully this will help in that regard.

I know that my legions of readers are curious about who were these women who so impacted me, what sort of girls were they that shaped and shook me so? Well the answers are, in chronological order, Chelsea, Susie, and Claire.

I know that this blog is many times more popular than our school newsletter and most Trinity alums and current students have an RSS feed to it, so they may recognize the previous names. "How very odd," they might reflect, "None of these girls appeared to care about Kyle in the least." Exactly.

Just to get you all in the mindset of 15 year old me, here are my original Xanga posts, from Tuesday, November 16, 2004.

"Hey guys this the xanga im gonna use from now on i used to have an ebloggy but i got tired of it. So yah whatsn new w/ me hmh. Yesterday i went to B&N and D-hutch was there and we hung out for a while so that was cool. Today i went to school and it was cool, courtnety was acting a little wierd. We had the senior auction for guys and me and Jade bought John Claiborne for $42. Then i had ca and we played stickball, lifted, and then messed around. so thats about it. see ya

-Kyle"

and

"so i added some cool mellow music to my xanga by the beatles, they didnt have and zep or floyd so i went w/ them."

The first thing one may notice is my frequent use of the colloquialism "cool" and my strange fascination with nick names. (The nick name thing gets worse as the xanga progresses) Also you may notice my fascination with proving myself "cool" I accomplish this by informing the reader of my love for classic rock bands of the 70's.

It is very easy to tell why a woman would find me unlikeable.