I've Had Enough of You (Go Away)

Manny, we get it, you do really well in LA, you're wild and unpredictable (You have dreads!) LA is wild and unpredictable, (Gays!) it's a perfect match. Now you no longer have arrogant annoying white people supporting you, but arrogant annoying Latinos, this is truly a great development for baseball. You'll notice that they traded you, a man whose origin i don't know to multicultural LA and Bay, who is totally white (Canadian, he's like the white equivalent of superman) to totally white Boston. You know what this trade is really about? Bud Selig projecting his own racism on America. I hope you are pleased with yourself, Manny being Manny? No, Manny destroying the foundations of this country.



Brett Favre, I understand life really sucks in Mississippi, but must you project your own wanderlust on the rest of America? I really don't care about the state of your text message inbox. The worst part is that you were going to make $75 million if you stayed retired, do you know how many surgeries that could have paid for for Daunte Culpepper? Poor Jeff Garcia was worried he was going to have to work the streets of Tampa Bay if all the text rumors between Scott and Wilbon were true. So gratz on the Jets trade favre, you're now supported by the only fan base composed of people as old as you. Also you should be contractually obligated to play in Wranglers.

Michael Phelps. We get it, the man can swim. You know who else can swim? Every animal ever. Fetuses. Wind up toys. Eight gold is quite the feat, but do we really need to hear about how he is the greatest athlete of all time. He's not. As a swimmer he barely qualifies as an athlete. There is more to being an athlete than sheer ability, there has to be some thinking involved. You think michael phelps knows what to throw a lefty on a 1-2 count with a runner on 1st? Probably not, but I'm sure he could totally outswim me, very helpful never. Another annoying thing, his name similarity to David Phelps, Michael could never hope to match david's voice control on Virtuoso, even with his swimmers lungs.

Also I hate to ruin his image for all the pre-pubescent and post-menopausal fans of his, but the man got a DUI when he was 19. Does that sound like an American hero to you? It sounds like a criminal to me.